Molinaro 1 : 0 Wilder.

How shocking : Molinaro’s « L’emmerdeur » (1973) is far better than Wilder’s « Buddy, buddy » (1981), its remake. As if Brazil beat Canada in ice hockey, or Canada Brazil in soccer.

In « L’emmerdeur », a comedy-old recipe -the meeting of opposites- receives a fresh spin, as a grumpy hitman’s meticulously staged job is derailed by a down-on-his-luck loser’s poorly planned suicide attempt.

Sparkling comedy owes a lot to its odd couple, wrestler turned actor Lino Ventura and singer moonlighting as actor Jacques Brel. Claude Lelouch deserves procurer’s credit for arranging their initial on screen meeting one year before in « L’aventure, c’est l’aventure » : they belonged in an ensemble cast of third rate bad guys which also included Charles Denner, Charles Gérard and Aldo Maccione.

Their chemistry carries the day with effortless spontaneity. Francis Veber’s tight script and Molinaro’s fast pace successfully wrap up the movie : eighty minutes long, « L’emmerdeur » makes sure that, despite its title, it does not overstay its welcome.

« Buddy, buddy » is sixteen minutes, i.e. twenty per cent, longer and feels like a never ending agony. Film is stale, the fight too many of a cinema « dream team » : Billy Wilder and I.A.L. Diamond at the typewriter, Wilder behind the camera, Walter Matthau and Jack Lemmon before.

Great teams never die, but do not always age well : in 1981, Wilder is 75 years old, Diamond 61, Matthau too, Lemmon 56, for a grand total of 253 years versus 179 for « L’emmerdeur »’s Molinaro (45), Veber (36), Ventura (54) and Brel(44) in 1973.

An old men’s film versus a middle aged movie, one crawling along on a near empty tank of energy and creativity, the other spending them more freely than a Saudi Sheik his trunks of petrodollars.

« Buddy, buddy » is never funny : a sad « Sunset Boulevard » for Billy Wilder who shall never direct again. Film was so unsuccessful that it was never released in France : probably a « première » for Wilder’s « dernière » ; an act of mercy, too.

Reel after reel, round after round, « L’emmerdeur » beats « Buddy, buddy » hands down. But is it really an upset ? Can a remake best its model ?

« Buddy, buddy » may be watched, rather than as a bad film, as a professional suicide attempt by Wilder : the director did not as much remake « L’emmerdeur » as emulate Jacques Brel’s character, and succeed. The film failure becomes the director’s win : Wilder purposely raced to a catastrophe that put a final end to a career, which he was unable to quit of his own free will.

To remake a movie is to challenge the original’s director on his own turf, play by his rules and pay for the privilege. It is a duel set in your opponent’s back yard, in which you grant him the choice of arms and the first shot : if his film is good, you are dead before yours starts principal photography.

The odds are so much against you that the match seems rigged.

To remake a film, you must pay. To manage a return on your investment, you shall use what you pay for : your model original material. But how to claim credit to what you do not create but only imitate ? To prove your worth, you shall depart from the original film, and find yourself in a Catch 22 : the better the original, the smaller your chances to improve on it.

If you remake a great film, at best you can hope for a draw ; if you picked up a mediocre one, you are guilty of poor judgement.

Your only chance, and the rationale behind all remakes, is that your audience shall know nothing of your model movie and therefore see your film as an original one. Then, remaking « L’emmerdeur » is like hiring a ghost writer.

If your audience knows of the original film, but never watched it, you are still safe, but your model is not. This is how « Buddy, buddy » betrays « L’emmerdeur » : anybody who endures Wilder’s movie shall be hard to convince that « L’emmerdeur » is not beyond dreadful.